As humans, we have an innate desire to move forward – in life, in relationships, in career, in traffic (especially in traffic). When we feel like we are at a standstill (or worse, moving in the wrong direction), we have a tendency to get a little, well, freaked out.
I try not to dwell on it, but somehow lately thoughts about the future just seem to creep into my mind. What happens next – for me, my family, my career, my life? If I am having a down day and feeling a little sorry for myself, those thoughts tend to come with negative conclusion, which ultimately begins to turn into panic over the time that is being wasted, ultimately feeling like I’m missing out on something. Someone told me once that self-pity is just a twisted form of pride, which is true; you’re focusing on your own self-importance, just in a negative way.
When the bible talks about worry, it doesn’t do so lightly: do not worry about your life, which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his life?, do not worry about tomorrow, be without care, be anxious for NOTHING! Actually – my favorite interpretation is “do not be troubled with cares”.
I’m starting to thinking God wants me to get my eyes off everything else – get my eyes off myself – and focus on things HE is doing. As I ponder this thought, I realize that when we are worried, we miss the amazing gifts God gives us during our trials. When I am sick, my family surrounds me and we connect, we bond, we talk, we share, we laugh, we love. What better gift on earth could there possibly than this gift of time?
So – as I look down what appears from this side of the horizon to be a very narrow, road, I anxiously await whatever is on the other side knowing that God is giving me precious time.