As a Christmas gift, our kids gave us tickets to see Jeff Dunham in concert. The show was this last weekend and I have a hard time traveling lately so I was sort of dreading the 2 hour drive to Sac. A few norco’s, a good nap, and a charming driver/date made the trip well worth it, even without the show.
For those of you who are living in a hole (like apparently I was), Jeff is a comedian ventriloquist…and while his act is completely inappropriate, he is stinking hilarious. I often experience low back pain as well as face pain – my face hurts when I laugh (or cry, or make faces)…so that afternoon, I sat in an uncomfortable stadium seat, shifting relentlessly trying to keep my back from cramping up while holding my face desperately trying not to let my cheek and jaw muscles move while I completely cracked up! With my hands wrapped around my cheek bones and thumbs grasping my jaw, I could feel pressure building up all throughout my head. Finally, I couldn’t take it anymore and had to excuse myself to the ladies room, shuffling up the stairs as fast as I possibly could hoping to get out of earshot before my entire head exploded. As I made the climb I realized my knee wasn’t bending well and my feet were throbbing – but I laughed all the way out of the stadium.
After regaining my composure and letting my nerves calm down, I returned to my seat and was able to finish the show without serious incident. Dinner, more norco’s and we made it home.
3 days later, I’m still recovering. Perhaps it has more to do with the 21 day antibiotic regimen coming to an end. I hadn’t realized how much less pain I was having – but since being off the abx, my neck stiffness and head pain have returned with a vengeance. Yesterday was a full day of lying in bed (I’ll admit, I whined quite a bit too). Today, I was able to bathe (sounds easy, but for me it can be an absolutely exhausting chore!) and this afternoon I left the house for a short drive into town. It’s such a beautiful day today I thought I would try to do some gardening as well – that lasted a whole 5 minutes before I had to retreat to my room in collapse. I am so grateful for a daughter who is always here to pick up my fallen pieces and finish some of what I started.
I usually think that not being able to plan for things is the worst part of being sick; but really, I think the most discouraging part is not being able to finish what I am able to start. At least when I don’t make plans I’m not disappointed. When I can’t finish what I planned, that makes me sad. So this afternoon, I’ve been a little bit sad. And a little bit discouraged.
I can’t wait for the next discussion with my doctor to figure out the next steps in this journey. There are so many things in this world I want to do – some are as close as the tips of my fingers. But somehow, they seem so far out of reach. So I guess I am reminded once again that it is not the accomplishments, but the journey – the laughter, the tears, the sunshine and the rain – that makes life memorable.